One year

Well, tomorrow it will be a year since my best friend died. How can I describe this year. It passed like any other year. I had good days and bad days. Happy days and sad days. But I have to say that there were many days that I would think of Alan Wormser. I've been so amazed how many times I would be struck by his death in this year.

Some situations just seem to bring on the tears and the memories. Several times this year I've had to drive to meetings and workshops. On the open interstate with nothing to do but drive and think. More times than not I would start thinking about Alan. Think about how I had a crush on him when I was a young teenager. Think about how we continued to be friends after he moved away. I remember Alan introducing me to the woman who would be his wife. I really liked Kerynn. She was really sweet. I remember that I was so glad Alan found someone that would be so good for him. Someone that didn't have a strange background.

Then I would be sent to the depths of remorse. Regret that somehow we lost contact with each other. Five years went by without contact. In that time he moved to the East coast. Kerynn passed away and then he passed away.

Death is so final. Not just for the individual it happens to but to the friends and family. In this year I learned and understand why people of the past spent a year in mourning. It's taken about a year to be able to think of Alan without breaking down and sobbing or hitting a blue funk.

So, Alan, my friend, I wish you well in the here after. I think of you once in a while. It doesn't hurt so much. I just hope you are at peace. God bless you.