Fickle sisters? Or are they thick as thieves?

One wonders the dynamics of children. One day recently in our "happy home" it wasn't so happy. I don't remember exactly what happened to cause DQ to slap Miss Independence but it happened. I told DQ to go to her room and only come out when she was able to act in a more appropriate manner.

This caused DQ to run from the room screaming that she hated me. ST went to console her older sister. A few minutes latter ST comes out to tell us that DQ is packing up and running away from home. Next I see MI slipping away from the room in a manner that can only be called furtive. More minutes pass and out comes ST. Apparently MI has decided to join DQ in running away. This doesn't seem to bother DQ at all.

Now I'm totally stumped because the whole reason DQ is running away is unfair treatment in regards to MI, ie., MI gets better treatment than DQ. Apparently the plans are to run to DQ's friend's house to live happily ever after. If they were unavailable perhaps the neighbors would take them.

Wondering how we handled this situation? Well we pretty much let them pack their bags, boxes and various other modes of transporting stuff. This went on for about an hour. At 9:00 P.M. we told them that it was too late to runaway, and they needed to go to bed. As DQ calmed down she decided not to runaway after all. MI still wanted to go. In fact, MI continued to runaway all week. (Never actually walking out the door.) She had a black backpack packed. MI kept taking it to preschool all week. It snowballed to taking her slumber bag to preschool. Yesterday when I picked her up and put her in the minivan she said, "Well I'm ready to runaway." At four I suppose she hasn't got the full mechanics of running away down.

What amused me more was ST. She seemed rather eager to get rid of both her sisters. This is the first time that she's displayed any feelings about not wanting siblings. DQ frequently wishes out loud that she were an only child. MI tells me she doesn't like her sisters, because they are mean to her. (Which in my opinion is true.) So I was amazed when we asked whether ST was going to runaway, and she said she was staying and helping her sisters to pack.

In conclusion the two that were at logger heads with one another became partners in a running away scheme. ST had no desire to runaway and appeared rather eager to get rid of her siblings. As I've reported before that alliances are ever shifting in the world of childhood, especially among siblings.

Tender mercies

Well I find myself at work today. I did it on purpose. I didn't have to work. Someone else had already volunteered. But I wanted Passionfruit to spend time with our children. So to work I went.

Yesterday Passionfruit came home with the beginnings of the dreaded summer cold. I started to feel bad about this passive aggressive manuever. My poor sweet wasn't feeling well, and I was abandoning him to the tender mercies of our children.

I was out of work for 2 days. I didn't realize at the time that another co-worker would be out, too. So while I was here working I found her work to and did it. That way Monday will not be so horrible on her, and it gave me some more work to do.

I haven't received any phone calls from Passionfruit, so I'm assuming that all is well. I guess I'll find out how it went when I get back home. I have to confess that I don't believe that my drive home will be straight there. NO. I think a trip to Braum's is calling me. I haven't had any decadent sunades in a while.

While we're on the subject...

When I was pregnant with my children I had lots of strange dreams. After the two pregnancies I was amazed that the two pregnancies were similiar in that I had dreams. Each pregnancy I dreamt of celebrities. I am not a celebrity hound. I don't read the gossip rags. I may occassionally glance through People but do not seek it out. Another similiarity was the subject matter of the dreams remained constant for the particular pregnancy and each of the subject matter was disturbing for markedly different reasons.

For the first pregnancy I will not describe those dreams in detail; nor, even hint to what they were about. What I'll tell you is Goldie Hawn, Sally Fields and several other female actresses were in those dreams.

While I carried MI the actors ranged from Don Knotts to Tom Cruise (Which some of you may remember that I disliked Tom Cruise long before it came into vogue.) These were dreams of action, adventure, murder and doomsday. I was hounded with dreams about serial murderers, mass murderers and the end of the Earth as we know it. It use to scare me. I thought perhaps I was being possessed by the devil or something.

Where is all of this leading to? My Mom picked up my girls from their respective institutions. When she got to MI's she was handed a report. It wasn't good. In fact it was down right scarry! My little darling had her hands around another child's throat! She was doing her best at strangling the little guy. His offense? He told her he wasn't her friend.

Hmmm! Now that was a tactic I never thought of as a child longing for friendship and companionship. They won't be my friends I'll just kill 'em!

What's even funnier is we do not use physical punishment. Okay. We give 'em a slap on the hinney when they are behaving dangerously. Things like... playing with matches, running into the street, strangling other children... OOPS I didn't do that. No. I talked to her about how she could have really hurt the other child. I told her how disappointed I was with her behavior.

Reflecting on things that have happened over the past year in preschool I realize that MI is far more violent than my other children have ever been. This past year she told other children in her class that I would come and shoot them with my gun. (I don't own a gun!) MI resorts to her fists and feet first. What I'm wondering is... were the dreams an indication of what is to be? Do I have some sort of budding criminal on my hands? Pray not. I wonder whether the preschool teachers think she comes from an abusive family.

My little darling is the cutest thing in the world. She is sweet and funny but I don't think you want to make her mad. I keep telling myself that her spunk will hold her in good stead when she's an adult. I've told MI not to turn bitter. I've told her to stay sweet. This was one of those days where I wonder if I will ever get this parenting thing down.

A blessed event

This past weekend was a really busy weekend. Sunday my niece gave birth to a little boy. I'm still trying to think of a name for the little guy. I went to see him on Monday. I took my mother after her doctor's appointment.

Those two people had such a difficult time. My niece went into preclampsia. So the doc induced labor. Zach was turned in a bad position. A couple of times his heart rate went down. My poor niece labored for 12 hours. I know it could have been longer but still 12 hours is a long labor. Zach, even though 3 weeks early, was a good size. He weighed 5 lbs. 14 oz. and was 20 inches long. He is beautiful.

When we saw him at the hospital he was all wrapped up good and tight. He had a little hat on and the blankets went up over the top of his head. Zach was having a hard time keeping his body temperature. He slept through our whole visit, even though I tried very hard to wake the little guy up.

In conclusion, all I know is this little guy took my heart. He has the sweetest little nose. It is so perfect. My heart aches that my niece suffered so while delivering him but she is such a little trooper. She never complained once and kept assuring my mom that she was doing fine. I would include a link to his picture but apparently they chose not to allow his picture to be posted on the hospital's website. Bummer! Because I sure would like to show off this little tike.

Swing, balance and CRASH@!

This past weekend was a blast for Passionfruit and I. We managed to get people to keep our children overnight; although they were our responsibility during the day.


Our weekend began on Friday night with a great contra dance. So many friends that we haven't seen in years were there. It was wonderful to see them and catch up on stuff. The ballroom was decorated in pink flamingos, palm trees and christmas tree lights lined the windows of the hall.


At one point I danced a dance as a woman. It was a terribly difficult dance that even very experienced dancers were having troubles. My partner and I met up with a couple of women dancing together. One was a rather new dancer and the other was a rather poor man or perhaps I should say lead. I made a point to ask the new dancer to be my partner in the next dance. I assured her that I am a very good man. She seemed doubtful. I turned to a long time friend (male) and asked him to assure her that I was indeed a fine man. Well she did find out how good I was including being able to steal a kiss from my Passionfruit when the men met in the middle for an alemand right.


Later near the end of the dance I was dancing with an old flame when CRASH, BUM, BANG! Screechs of terror, gasps of horror! The flamingo on the mantle came crashing down along with the mirror. The fiddler magically escaped injury when by all rights she should have been cut up horribly. There was glass under her chair; in her case for her fiddle and under the case. The caller was totally freaked and that was the end of the dance. I have never been to a dance where the dance ended so abruptly.

We ended up going to the after party. Passionfruit talked me into it. A dear friend who's had to deal with a ugly divorce threw the party. It was also the hostess' son's birthday. I had to go.

Saturday night my sister came and picked up the girls. We had a few hours before the dance. We chose to have dinner alone together instead of joining the large group. I told Passionfruit that we so rarely get time without the kids that it is really important to me to have him alone for a while. We went to a local Mexican restaurant and had a lovely meal.

Then on to the dance. Nothing terribly exciting happened like the night before. But it was really great to see people. One of my many old dance partners were there. I use to be a wild twirling woman but do to certain health problems I no longer can twirl 3 or 4 times. It was hard having to control those men. Jimmy used to love to see how many twirls I could get in before having to get back to the patterns of the dance. I remember one time I did 5. I so amazed him. Jimmy was my main partner that I had to control. I never did get a chance to tell him that my days of whirling like dirvish are gone.

The weekend ended with an after party at a friend's house. I had volunteered us to help with clean up. I got so tired I fell asleep on the couch in the sun room. Passionfruit woke me up at 2:30 AM to tell me it was time to go home. He had helped to clean up all by himself. I'm so proud of him.

Things I regret

A couple of weekends ago I was driving DQ around. We listened to a local Country station. A guy came on, and his whole song was about regrets. He didn't use that word but that's what he meant. So I took that as a teaching moment. I explained to DQ that that guy was experiencing regret and what an aweful thing that is.

Well DQ asked me if there was anything I regret. I had to think very hard. Overall I'm pretty happy with my life and the way I've lived it. I haven't killed anyone. I haven't done drugs. Oh I've had my fun but it was all good, clean fun. So this got me to thinking.

When I was a Senior Girl Scout I had my Gold Award earned in that I had all the badges and other peliminary stuff done. The only things I lacked were documenting my work and doing the project. The council even offered me extra time. I turned it down because I didn't think that that was fair to the other girls who did all their work in the time allotted for the award. I remember how my mother nagged me. She kept saying over and over-- "You're going to regret this some day."

Now I'm 38 years old. I have a satisfying career. I'm a mother and a wife. My husband love me. My children love me. And never once in the last twenty years have I regretted not getting the Gold Award.

No. What I regret is that I didn't have the guts to audtion for the Oklahoma Arts Institute, Quartz Mountain the first year I was eligible. I regret this so much. So much so, that I think I might turn into that stage mother that some have accused me of being and nag, and push my daughters to try out as soon as they are eligble. I envision locking them in their rooms the night before the audition and waking them in the morning. Filling their stomachs with good protein packed food. Whisking them out the door and dragging them into the studio to audition for this prestigious summer camp.

So there is my secret-- I regret that I didn't audition until the very last year I was eligible. It isn't all that shocking of a regret. I don't need to bow my head in shame. Nor do I need to worry about my enemies finding this out and using it against me. Oh! Are you wondering how the audtion went? Guess!... I didn't get chosen for the OAI. I made a horrible mess of the audition.