The birth

As you know I've had my fourth daughter. She was born on March 31st at 5:40 P.M. The birth experience was totally different. I was induced. This labor is horrible. The contractions are unrelenting but the positive side of the experience was a great labor nurse. She attended to me with great compassion. She made the experience really wonderful. I thank her for that because this was truly a difficult labor for me. And I stress me. I know that my labor and delivery wasn't horrible in that there were no emergencies; no excessive blood; nothing earth shaking. For me the IV was horrible. They had a hard time putting in the IV. My veins are not terribly visible and they roll when they are found.

I hate to admit it but I lost it. I became a weeping, sniveling, mess. The nurse called the doc and the doc told me we could do it another time. I told her no way. They finally got that IV in and I wasn't going to go through that again. Doc told me there was no way she was going to go forward with me in the state I was in. I had many reasons why I had to do it that day. Most importantly ST could not go through with another false alarm (March 19 I had gone to the hospital with false labor); secondly my sister, who's my doula, had to go out of town April 1 for her job. I told the doc to get my sister back in the room. Together we got me calmed down enough to start the pitocin. The contractions didn't start immediately so I was able to participate in conversation, something I never did in the other deliveries.

At some point when the contractions started to get serious I heard my sister say, "She's doing it. She's going away. She's putting herself into that 'trance'." It was true. I was concentrating on my focal point; concentrating on breathing through the pain. My nurse was good about putting me into different positions. I was good about remembering to use the bathroom. While I labor I used a birthing ball; a rocking chair and PF. PF and I did the labor dance. Poor man he didn't have a clue at first what I wanted. He felt lost. All I wanted was for PF to hold me and rock me while we stood between the rocking chair. This is also the only labor I remember where I broke out in a drenching sweat. It was pouring off me. The longest part of the labor was waiting for that little stinker to move down the birth canal. Getting up and moving was the best thing to facilitate that movement. I was glad my nurse supported that kind of labor. (By the way I did this birth naturally. No drugs, other than pitocin.)

Finally I felt ready to push. Boy did things get hopping then. There was so much activity in the room. I think there were about 10 nurses in the room. I was ready to push and I was going to push. But they told me I couldn't. They made me pant. I panted for so long and so hard my whole body started to tingle. I never experienced that sensation before in my life. It totally freaked me out. In fact I got to thinking I didn't need any stinking doctor to deliver this kid. I had done it before I could do it again. (This is why they were having me pant to keep a spontaneous birth from happening) Anyway the nurses were watching the parking lot. Then all of a sudden you could hear them cheering the doctor on her way. She was running across the parking lot. As soon as she got into the room I told them I was pushing. Again I was ordered not to push. In fact the doc wanted to readjust me on the bed. She wanted me to pick up my bottom and scoot down the bed more. I didn't want to do it but then she got stern and I did it. I finally got to push and my little baby girl was born. I didn't push very long at all-- 10 minutes tops. I remember the little head of black hair. Her hair was all wavy and she had lots of it.

Now she is 10 weeks old. She's finishing her 2nd week at child care today. The highlight of that experience is her first day. First day of child care 2 weeks ago, baby got sent home. She would not take a bottle and kept being startled by all the noise in the class room. I've been going down and nursing her. I'm so glad I chose a place close to my work. I love going down there and nursing her.

Today, I brought a different bottle and some milk for them to try. I held off going down there to give them some time to give it to her. I walked in just as she was finishing it. So the little stinker found a bottle she would take. Did I mention it's the cheapest bottle I've bought? Just 99 cents. Yep. So much for the expensive Playtex nursers. So much for the Medela bottles. There you have it.

Yesterday, I found a bottle that is suppose to mimic the mother's breast perfectly. It's even won awards. It's also the most expensive bottle I've bought so far. Wonder if the little stinker will take it?